Who Can I Trust: A Naptown Hood Drama (Trust Issues Book 1) Read online

Kayla almost gagged, thinking of how these kids were growing up just a little too fast and hearing some grown folk things that they just shouldn’t be hearing. “Oh no you didn’t,” she said, gently slapping her brother upside his head.

  “Owe,” Latrell said, doing the most. “Don’t hit me like that. Mister John came to the school and told us that was domestic violence.”

  “And it affects men, too,” Linell said, adding her own two cents to the mix.

  Just then, Kayla squinted her eyes at Latrell and Linell. She pointed at the food setting in front of them. “Hurry up and domestic violence that food right on up so we can get outta here,” Kayla said, leaving the kitchen.

  As she walked to the front room, she could hear the two of them snickering and talking amongst themselves in the kitchen. In the few minutes that she would be waiting on them to finish their breakfast, she decided to watch the news a little. Kayla normally didn’t watch the news all the much. However, since she was starting to be somewhat the responsible caregiver for these two little kids, she had gotten into a habit of watching just to see if there was anything going on in the city or out on the roads that she should be aware of. Just as the commercials were going off and the news was coming back on, the front door swung open. Cold, winter air rushed inside the living room as Kayla’s mother Rolanda came hurrying in.

  “Damn, it’s cold out there,” Rolanda said.

  Kayla rolled her eyes and put her attention back onto the television screen. “Good morning, Mama.”

  Instantly sensing a little attitude, Rolanda turned around and looked her daughter Kayla up and down. “And what is your problem?”

  Kayla looked at her mother, noticing how she was half-assed put together. Her hair, which she had just gotten done not more than three days ago, was looking somewhat untamed. Kayla gave her the benefit of the doubt and figured that it could have been a combination of sleeping on it wherever she was, the wind, and the snow. In the back of her mind, however, Kayla figured that none of those were the real reason her mother’s head was looking so unpresentable. Furthermore, her entire appearance looked like she had just been getting some dick somewhere. Her sweater was wrinkled and halfway pulled down over her very shapely lower body. Her red pants were so tight they looked like another layer of skin, pronouncing the dimples in her thighs. Her makeup was just gone at this point.

  “I ain’t say I had no problem,” Kayla said. “I was just saying good morning. How was your evening?”

  Rolanda had had enough of her daughter’s mouth lately. She understood that she was a young woman now and not a little girl. However, she still was her child and lived under her roof. There were certain things that she just could not slide. On top of all that, her head was killing her right then. She had only had a few hours of sleep over at Kevin’s place before she woke up to use the bathroom and decided to just go on and carry her ass home.

  “My evening was fine, if you must know,” Rolanda said as she got herself together from coming in out of the cold. “I’m not sure I’m liking this tone you’re taking with me right now, Kayla.”

  Just then, Kayla rolled her eyes then tossed the remote back onto the couch. Once she’d seen that nothing had changed in terms of her day, whatever her mother was saying to her was irrelevant at that moment.

  “Kayla?” Rolanda said, never liking when she was ignored. “Little bitch, what the fuck is your fuckin’ problem?”

  “Latrell, Linell!” Kayla announced heading into the dining room and grab both her brother’s and sister’s coats. “Come on, y’all, so we can get going. Come on and hurry up, y’all!”

  “Kayla?” Rolanda said, again. “I know you hear me talking to you.”

  Kayla turned and looked at her mother, still standing in the living room, just to the side of the television. The older Kayla got, and especially since she graduated and had more time at home compared to when she was in school, the less she could really stand to be around her mother. Everything about her was just a big turn off. To Kayla, in fact, it was quickly starting to feel like she was talking to someone that was in the same age group as her. And she just did not like that, especially when her mother would get into her bratty ways. To Kayla, that shit was just not cute.

  “Damn,” Kayla said, feeling frustrated that her mother would come walking through the door at the last minute like this and trying to get her in her shit. “What, Mama? What?”

  “What is the attitude about?” Rolanda asked again.

  “I told you,” Kayla said. “I ain’t got no attitude. I don’t even know why you try’na come in right after the crack of dawn and act like you try’na be a mother for all of ten minutes today. Damn, Mama. That shit ain’t cute.”

  Rolanda was appalled at what she was hearing out of Kayla’s mouth.

  “Kayla,” Rolanda said. “Little bitch, I think you ought to be showing me a little more respect than that. I mean, after all, look around.” Rolanda’s arms were now waiving around as she pointed at different pieces of furniture and the entertainment system. “I keep a roof over your head and shit and when I wanna go out and have a little fun, I come home to you giving me the cold shoulder and shit like I done did you wrong or something. If you don’t like having to do something around here, why the fuck you don’t just move out and go stay with that nigga, whatever his name is, and do whatever he need you to do for you to get him to take care of you. You grown now, and I guess that’s why you got this shitty attitude. But I’m lettin’ you know. I ain’t feelin’ this shit and I definitely am not the one. I ain’t even had that much sleep.”

  “Ain’t that a shame,” Kayla said, rolling her eyes and sounding sarcastic in her delivery. “I guess I got a little bit of sleep. I knew I’d have to get up and play mommy. Some of us can’t say the same.”

  Just then, Latrell and Linell came running into the dining room. They approached Kayla, who handed each of them their coat. They started to slide into them as they picked up on what was going on between their mother and their older sister. Instantly, the two nine year olds could feel the tension in the room. It was oh so obvious.

  “Play mommy,” Rolanda said, shaking her head. “Girl, you really done got that head blown up. Thinking you really up in her doin’ something, huh? Is that what the fuck is goin’ through your mind? Look here, Kayla. Listen up, little girl. You ain’t did shit. Ever since that nigga that is your no good daddy left, you’ve had the best life I can provide to you and this is the thanks I get.”

  Kayla helped Latrell zip his coat all the way up to his neck. “I see you still a little messed up from last night, huh?” Kayla said, shaking her head. “I damn sure was not givin’ you any thanks, Rolanda.”

  “Girl, what has gotten into you?” Rolanda asked as she marched into the dining room. In the light and much closer than when she’d come in from outside, Kayla could see the bags under her mother’s eyes. It was very obviously she had probably been up drinking and smoking, somewhere, for several hours then had a nap before rushing home like a teenage girl who stayed out passed her curfew.

  “Mama, whatever,” Kayla said, just wanting her mother to walk away or go do something – anything – with herself and get the hell out of her face. “It’s too early for this,” Kayla said in a very definitive tone. “And, unlike a certain chill chick I know, I got to get my little brother and sister to school.” Just then, Kayla turned up and looked at her mother, looking dead into her eyes. “You know you wasn’t gon’ do it,” she said. “Anytime you supposed to get them up and take them to school, they wind up being late or missing the first couple of hours and we start getting them calls from the school.”

  “Kayla,” Rolanda said. “You not gon’ be talkin’ to me like I’m some bad mother or something, you hear me? That’s exactly why I came home when I did.” At this point, Rolanda was lying and she knew it. She just could not allow her grown daughter who lived in her house to talk to her any old kind of way. There were certain things that she just would not put up with. “I mean, if y
ou got that much of a problem doin’ a little somethin’ around here, you can take your grown self and get to steppin’ right on out the door. Get a fuckin’ job and get your own place, or go move in with that nigga you call a boyfriend. I don’t give a fuck what you do, but I can tell you this. You won’t be talkin’ to me any old kind of way, I don’t care how old and grown you get.” Just then, Rolanda felt herself getting thirsty. She had smoked a couple of blunts with Kevin before the two of them passed out last night. She went to sleep with cotton mouth and woke up with at as well. And it was killing her to keep talking like that with Kayla without getting something to drink. “Go stay with that nigga, whatever his name is. Maybe he’ll let you sit up and do nothing. You not gon’ talk to me like this, I can tell you that.”

  Kayla looked down into her siblings eyes, finding their eyes locked on hers and practically coming close to swelling with tears. This was not the first time that the two nine year olds had seen their older sister Kayla getting in their mother’s shit. Furthermore, it would not be the last. Regardless, they hated when it happen, especially if everything else was going nicely. It always put Kayla in a bad mood.

  “Y’all ready?” Kayla asked, smiling. “Come on. I gotta get y’all to school. And we gotta let the car warm up a little bit. Did y’all get enough to eat?”

  The two of them nodded.

  “Good deal,” Kayla said. “Grab your book bags and let’s go.”

  Just then, Latrell and Linell each grabbed their backpacks off of the couch pressed against the wall in the living room and headed toward the door.

  “And now you takin’ my spare car to take them to school, huh?” Rolanda asked. It was very clear to Kayla that her mother’s tone was very condescending. To say the least, it really grinded her gears that she had to deal with her mother’s nasty attitude when she was the one getting up to do what her mother ought to be doing.

  “Girl, bye,” Kayla said, just wanting to move on and get out of the door.

  Kayla followed Latrell and Linell to the front door. Just as they pulled the door open and cold wind rushed into the living room, Kayla could hear her mother talking yet again from the doorway to the kitchen.

  “And come right back with my car and shit,” Rolanda said. “Since I ain’t shit, ain’t no reason for you to be using my car to get anywhere else. I’ll see you in an hour.”

  “Mama, whatever,” Kayla said. Just then, she stepped out onto the front poor and shut the door behind her. Those kinds of moments were the kinds of moments where Kayla really wished it was the last time closing the door behind. She wished it was the last time that she would have to deal with her mother walking through the door with her usual shitty demeanor. However, Kayla was just not having the best of luck with getting a job, and she really was not all that turned on by the idea of going back to school. In so many ways, high school had sort of fried her brain and she at least needed a couple of years off before she even considered doing something like that.

  While Kayla waited in the car with Latrell and Linell, waiting for her mother’s car to warm up after taking a short broom out of the back and sweeping the several inches of snow off of the windows, all she could think about was Marcus. Lately, she felt like everything was really starting to get serious with Marcus. However, a couple of weeks ago, when the two of them were chilling over at his place, Kayla made it a point to bring up moving in together. To say the least, Marcus just did not seem all that turned on by the idea. In fact, he was so indifferent to it that talking about it didn’t even happen. Rather, the topic of the conversation changed and next thing Kayla knew, she was still back at square one – a square where she was basically a prisoner in her mother’s house while also doing her job as a mother.

  Feeling a little angry about her mother coming in and trying to start some shit so early in the morning, Kayla went ahead and held her head high. She knew, inside and out, that she was not a dumb chick. She knew that even though her current situation was not ideal, it would only be temporary. Plus, she also thought on the bright side. She knew deep down that she would probably feel guilty if she did move out and leave her brother and sister to fin for themselves when it came to Mama. The older she got, the less fucks she gave. And it was increasingly becoming obvious.

  Kayla drove Latrell and Linell toward School 42, which sat at the corner of 25th Street and Rader Street. The drive was only about a mile and a half. However, with the snow, Kayla had to be sure to take it school, particularly at the corners. Yes, the main streets, like Martin Luther King Jr., were cleared, but the side streets were a slushy mess. Kayla felt so lucky that the temperature was not lower, or else the slush would have frozen over to some nasty ice.

  “Kayla, what were you and mama arguing about?” Linell asked.

  Kayla looked at Linell in the reflection of the rearview mirror. She smiled, loving how her little sister was always so caring. At the same time, though, she hated how she was such an intelligent, yet inquisitive, girl to only be nine years old. Kayla shook her head.

  “Nothing,” Kayla answered. “You know how Mama be acting.”

  “Was she drunk and high, again?” Latrell came out and asked.

  Just then, Kayla shook her head. She hated that her younger brother and sister could pick up on something like that. It always made her so uncomfortable to have to talk about that kind of stuff with them. However, even to them at nine years old, it was becoming obvious. There were times that their mother Rolanda would come walking through the door as if she was in a little bit of pain. Other times, she would come walking through the door with eyes that were practically blood shot red – not to mention the times she came home and passed out on the living room couch and wreaked of alcohol even when you just walked by her.

  “Look, don’t y’all worry about all that,” Kayla said. “Y’all just kids and shit. Ain’t no point in worrying about whatever Mama was talkin’ bout. Plus, y’all know how she be trippin’. She was just tired and not really feelin’ right. Y’all know she gon be actin’ totally different when you see her later on today, after she done passed out finally and got some sleep. Don’t trip over her. Just worry about school.”

  Kayla pulled up on the side of School 42, waiving at the security guard who was standing by the door as kids walked from their parents’ vehicles to the doors of the school. He was a tall, somewhat chubby dude that had a really country boy kind of smile about him. At first, Kayla hadn’t even noticed him. However, after some months of her starting to basically play mommy, she noticed how hard he would be looking her way. After a while, he would start to smile then waive. Now it was the kind of thing where the two of them would waive and smile when they saw each other in the morning, but nothing else.

  Kayla said bye to Latrell and Linell as they climbed out of the car and made their way toward the doors to the school. Once they were inside, the security guard waived again and Kayla waived back. She pulled off, hyperventilating. Thoughts about what her mother had come home saying to her and how she was starting shit began to come through her mind again. Just as she came to a stop at a corner a block or so down from the school, she could feel her phone vibrating in her pocket. Instantly, she began smiling. She already knew that it would be Marcus.

  “This nigga bet ‘not have sent another dick pic,” Kayla said, as she shook her head and dug her cell phone out of her coat pocket. After quickly checking her rearview mirror to see if any cars were coming behind her, and seeing that the street was clear, she opened the text message.

  Marcus: You forget about a nigga, huh?

  Kayla giggled, shaking her head. Just as she began to type out a reply to Marcus’ message, she decided that she would go ahead and just call.

  “Hello?” Marcus answered, clearly sounding as if he was still lying in bed.

  “Nigga, don’t be answering like you pullin’ yourself out of deep sleep,” Kayla said, wanting to laugh. “You already know that you been up for at least a good hour and a half.”

  Marcus chuckl
ed, his deep voice sounding so smooth through the phone. “You don’t know that,” Marcus said, clearly sounding as if he was purposely trying to sound snappy. “It ain’t like you was layin’ up with a nigga last night or anything, so how you know?”

  Kayla hyperventilated and shook her head. “Marcus, don’t even get me started on that shit,” she said. “You not gon’ believe what happened this morning when I was gettin’ Latrell and Linell ready for school.”

  “Hold up,” Marcus said, halting the conversation. “Where you at?”

  “Over off Martin Luther King, why?” Kayla answered.

  “I wasn’t try’na talk to you over the phone,” Marcus said. “I wanna see you and touch you….and feel you.”

  “Damn, nigga,” Kayla said, smiling. “You always horny and shit, ain’t you?”

  Marcus chuckled. “When I’m talkin’ to you,” he answered.

  “Nigga, please,” Kayla said. “Stop with the romantic shit. I’m on my way.”

  “Good,” Marcus said. “I got a blunt already waiting.”

  “Aight, aight,” Kayla said, now seeing that a car was pulling up on her bumper. “I’ll be over there in like twenty minutes or so.”

  “Okay, okay,” Marcus said. “Be careful,” he added.

  Kayla almost blushed at hearing that – at hearing the very words she knew that her own mother should have been telling her just twenty minutes earlier when she and her brother and sister were walking out the door.

  ***

  Marcus had had his own place for a minute, maybe like a year and half or so. In fact, ever since he hit eighteen years old, as a senior in high school, he moved out of his mother’s house. At first, he had a roommate then he found a place he was cool with to have on his own. He was already growing into his own man, and making some real money moving that work out in the streets. Last thing he needed was his mother and father breathing down his neck. They were always asking so many questions. The way they tried to fill in gaps in Marcus’ story and his schedule just drove him crazy. On top of all that, Marcus knew that if he wanted things to go rather smoothly with Kayla, it would probably just be better that he just stayed out on his own.